Finding a moment of peace through a ritual
Spending endless days and nights in a hospital, parenting in a fishbowl, looking at a clock, seeing it is 7:00-and wondering if that means morning or evening is all too common for parents who are experiencing long hospital stays with their babies.
In our ongoing Wellness series, we’ll cover different ways that caregivers and families can practice self-care.
“What are you doing to take care of yourself?”
“Let me know if you need a break.”
“Would it help to get a volunteer to sit with her?”
Your healthcare team truly cares about you as a person and a caregiver and mean the very best when they ask about caring for yourself. And yet, where do you find the time, where can you find a moment? Starting with a simple act that can be easily repeated is likely to be more successful-and practical than arranging a weekly spa day!
Naming that act, identifying that moment may also help remind you of its importance. Calling it a ritual, which can be described as a “system of rites; a ceremonial act or action; a series of acts regularly repeated” (Merriam-Webster Dictionary) may be helpful as a reminder of caring for yourself.
What can a ritual look like in the midst of a long hospitalization with your baby?Almost anything! Keep it simple and easily repeatable - can you do it every day? Can a “have to” thing become a “want to” thing become a ritual?
Photo by Fabian Møller on Unsplash
Breathe
When you (finally) end your day and rest - can you breathe…in for four seconds, hold for four seconds and then out for four seconds? Can you do that five times-at the end of each day? That is one minute. That is a ritual.
Photo by Kira auf der Heide on Unsplash
Coffee and Tea
Having a cup of coffee or making a cup of tea - every morning or afternoon-in the same cup or mug from home can help us feel grounded. A simple routine that you can look forward to doing.
Listening to Music or Audiobook
Can you listen to music or a book while you walk around the unit with your baby or, better yet, outside to the garden or in the neighborhood around the hospital?
Photo by Margarida Afonso on Unsplash
Make Something
Are you artistic or enjoy a project? Reach out to Child Life and ask for color pencils, a coloring book or yarn and learn to knit. The key is to find the time each day to make it a routine-a ritual.
In finding that space for a ritual, we wish you a moment of peace.
And every day, the world will drag you by the hand, yelling
“This is important! And this is important. You need to worry about this!
And this! And this!
And each day, it is up to you to take your hand back, put it on your heart and say
“No, this is what’s important”Iain Thomas
